In the Blink of an Eye...

Wow... Today was the scariest day of my life. I finally know what it means when someone says, "I saw my life flash before my eyes..." I was traveling southbound on the 99 headed toward Valley Children's with my mom for the appointment for Shelbi's hip... No big deal... talking, listening to kid's praise and worship...then, BANG!! HOLY COW!!... I thought I'd been hit as my car started fish-tailing out of control at 80 mph. I grabbed the wheel with both hands but could hardly control it. It was veering off to the right so strongly it was as if my Sequoia had a mind of it's own. I quickly yanked the wheel to the left and over compensated sending us barreling into the center divider, crashing into the railing. The car immediately rebounded and spun back onto the freeway. Only, we weren't going straight with the flow of traffic, we were positioned horizontally headed for the right side of the road, crossing over the left and middle lanes. At that point I braced myself, fully expecting to be t-boned by an oncoming big rig aimed right at the passenger door...where my mother was sitting. All I could think was-- that this was it. But I wasn't overly frightened for myself, it was all that was left behind...How would Justin raise our childern without a mother? Who would ever love them like I do? My family needs me...

Somehow, the traffic that I knew had been there only seconds before was gone...maybe they had seen me flying out of control and slammed on their brakes...I don't know. I did see a few cars pass in the slow lane. Luckily we never made it over there. I was able to quickly grab the wheel and yank it hard to the left causing us to make a sort of u-turn that at least got us headed in the flow of traffic again. From that point we lost momentum and I pulled over to the center divider, again, slowing to a complete stop...

I looked at my mom and at Shelbi (who slept peacefully through the entire ordeal) and couldn't believe that we were all ok...trembling and saying "thank you Jesus" a million times, but ok. So that's what it's like. One second you're here...and the next you're not. And all because I blew a tire... That's what my life is hanging on...a $200 piece of rubber? What a traumatic experience it was today. A million thoughts rushing through my head. "Lord, it's up to you. Whatever happens is your doing. I trust you..." At that point all you can do is surrender. And He answered...merciful and lovingly protective...It wasn't my time. But, I know this much, if it had been, (as scared as I was) it was a relief, and such a peaceful feeling to know exactly where I was going...